Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Freelance Marketing Services

I would like to offer marketing services to the Occupy Wall Street movement. The way I see it is you have a number of great points. Here's what we can do to improve your campaign..
  • Targeted messaging > the public isn't clear about exactly what the issue is. There are a number of them and they are all pretty valid but we need to hone in on one powerful message that will keep people motivated
  • Slogan > You need something catchy and memorable like "Where's the beef" or "Just do it"
  • Printing and design > the movement is in need of a good designer to develop some brand standards and create signs to then be professionally printed on decent card stock. The homemade signs are often sloppy, hard to read and they do not force the spectating public or the wall street bankers to take it seriously.
  • Logo > We need a logo that represents what the movement stands for. This logo can be placed on Tee shirts and baseball caps. We can also consider key chains, thumb drives and water bottles depending on the budget
  • Spokesperson > we need a spokesperson designated to keep the message clear and speak to the media. This person must be articulate and intelligent. Between the ages of 28 - 37, and formally educated. a person with a good American back story so that the public can identify and the media will want to profile him/her. The rationale behind the age range is so that the person is young enough to represent the sentiment of the young but old enough to gain trust and credibility from skeptics and doubters. They must be educated to combat the ignoramuses who say "just get an education and get a job".. And by "good American back story" I mean we need a rise and a fall and the belief that they can rise again. We need promising background but obvious victimization by the man/establishment.
  • We need a theme song. Maybe something by Kanye West. He's empowering and Obama thinks he's a jackass
  • We need collateral > flyers that clearly and concisely outlinine the objectives. To be handed out at Manhattan train stations below west 4th street, at local colleges and at the unemployment office to start.
  • We need an official website and 1 official facebook page and twitter account. With that we can work on strategically placed digital banner Ads and a paid search campaign.
  • We need bi weekly Webinars to update the movement on progress and next steps
  • We need a deadline.. What do we want to happen and by when.. or else what?
And I don't want you to worry that these suggestions will make your image too corporate. Even an anti-corporate, anti-rich, anti-anti message needs organization and clarity.

Serial Groping... Hide Your Goodies!

I'm not saying this isn't a serious sex crime but what is with all the serial groping going on in this city? Has it increased? or have the reports increased? Is it a chicken or the egg situation? This summer/fall we have had serial gropers on the upper east side, one in Astoria and one in Brooklyn and I'm just wondering why we never had this crisis before. It's not the stuff a good episode of Law & Order SVU is made of but it's still a concern. I'm just wondering why it's such a major news story. Don't we have serial gropers in every middle school and high school across the city? I remember when this was a school yard game (5th grade, Sacred Heart School of JESUS for crying out loud). Haven't us girls been fighting off gropers since we were like 11? I remember the first time I was groped. I was going up the stairs at a classmates basement birthday party (I think I had on my purple jeans). The offender was 11 or 12 and he was in my class. I remember turning around in a rage (more because I knew I should than because I was actually pissed) and telling him NOT to touch me in that severe way that you speak to an unruly child. I'm not sure if he was a serial groper per se but he had an early start so who knows. Ladies, protect what your mama gave ya and remember, "a crowded train is not an excuse for unlawful sexual conduct."

Why you don't talk about Real Issues at Work

A 24 year old girl who lives with her parents said everyone is saying the economy is bad but I see so many people out shopping and eating at restaurants.

A 60 yr old woman said, those wall street protesters say they are protesting corporations but they all have Apple iphones

Both succeeded in ruining my lunch. If you don't get it then stay silent. Limit the conversation to talking shit about coworkers.